Season of Waiting

Life is about seasons.  Many a time in the mist of something I don't know how long the season will be.  God seems to not reveal deadlines or changes right away.  I'm reminded of Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8 in that "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens".  When I read the passage I see a juxtaposition of hard & easy; good and bad; lovely and challenging.  

I'm in a season of waiting.  

Waiting.  

Not knowing.  

Anticipating.  

I don't know how my life will end up exactly.  I can only trust that in the waiting God will use it for His glory.  There are lessons to be learned for sure...some of them I'm already learning, others still to come.  

I'm waiting for one thing then another was stacked upon that.  I imagine myself in an enormous floor to ceiling dark wood bookcase library filled with big leather bound pages in which God lays in my arms one book labeled "Relationship".  Then I watch Him as He climbs up the ladder to choose another.  This time marked "Work".  

Yours could be different.  Perhaps you have more books piled high in your arms.  

Whatever the case I realize that I can't do this.  I hope you do too.  I can't hold these thick heavy books in my hands alone.  That's when God comes back over when I call on Him.  "Lord, please help me I need you".  He does.  He has me sit down beside him as he opens up the pages and reveals things I don't want to see.  I'd rather run away.  Hide.  Sleep.  Anything to get away from dealing with pain.  Hardship.  Hurt.  Gently and graciously He leads to to rest in His pasture.  To not hold on tightly to things that I want.  To allow Himself to be revealed.  

It's beautiful.  It's hard.